Location:uhh... I was hoping you could tell me that.
Relationship:Single
Orientation:Straight
Children:Maybe Someday
Body Type:Slim / Slender
Religion:Wiccan
Ethnicity:Undead
About Me:ummm.....i dont have alot to say about who i am because im still trying to figure that out for my self. what i do know is that god didnt put me on this earth to please any one so dont go judging me thinking im gonna play along with your stupid little immature games. I'm sorta anti-social, thats why I prefer to talk to people on the computer, not in person, but i love talking to new people. I love to write poetry, witch you might have already guessed. for so long now, I've had to wake up every morning, smell the breake up, and realize we arent gonna make up, I just wish some one would come cure this pain. how could one person be so ****ing stupid as to do what i did?
some one once said this song describes me perfectly, i dont know if i should take that as an insult or not:
Do you memorize theatrical lines
That seem to lead them in
Play the role with a good girl heart
Hide the tangled webs within
Who was it that led you on,
and makes you want to hurt me so?
Who do you want to forget,
That forgot you long ago?
Do you still feel him
Calling in the air tonight
Do you still feel it
Seems like you've done this before
You make breaking hearts look so easy
(seems like you've done this before)
You've got breaking hearts all but down
(and you've done this, you've done this before)
You make stealing hearts look so easy
(where is the girl I adore?)
You've got breaking up all but down
(and I can't love a thief anymore)
Do you collect the souls you've lost
In the top of your dresser drawer
Count the number of tears displaced
On lonely bedroom floors
A machine where your heart once was
Slowly takes the place of you
Only hold the memories now
Of a love I thought I knew
Do you still feel him
Calling in the air tonight
Do you still feel it
Seems like you've done this before
You make breaking hearts look so easy
(seems like you've done this before)
You've got breaking hearts all but down
(and you've done this, you've done this before)
You make stealing hearts look so easy
(where is the girl I adore?)
You've got breaking up all but down
(and I can't love a thief anymore)
You make breaking hearts look so easy
You've got breaking hearts all but down
You make breaking hearts look so easy
(seems like you've done this before)
You've got breaking hearts all but down
(and you've done this, you've done this before)
__________________________________
Music:here are my favorite verses from my favorite songs by my favorite band Anberlin......
Darklit streets are no place for kids
But it gives us more of a home than anywhere we've lived.
We're the scientists left to our own demise.
You're still our last chance to get out of this place alive.
Wait for me, will you wait for me with arms wide?
Can't get your memory, off of my mind.
Just want your heartbeat, on top of my mine.
There's something dancing, here in the shadows
And I wish it were us.
Do you remember when we were just kids,
and cardboard boxes took us miles from what we would miss?
School yard conversations taken to heart,
and laughter took the place of everything we knew we were not.
I want to break every clock.
the hands of time could never move again.
We could stay in this moment for the rest of our lives.
Is it over now hey, hey is it over now?
I want to be your last first kiss
that you'll ever have.
I want to be your last first kiss.
Amazing how life turns out, the way that it does.
We end up hurting the worst, the only ones we really love.
So let me get this straight
say now you loved me all along?
what made you hesitate
to tell me with words what you really feel
i can see it in your eyes you mean all of what you say
i remember so long ago, see i felt that same way
now we both have separate lives and lovers (and lovers)
insignificantly enough we both have significant others
but thoughts they change and times they rearrange i don't know who you are anymore
loves come and go and this i know i'm not who you recall anymore
but i must confess you're so much more then i remember
can't help but entertain these thoughts
thoughts of us together.
If you need a friend,
don't look to a stranger,
You know in the end,
I'll always be there.
And when you're in doubt,
and when you're in danger,
Take a look all around,
and I'll be there.
I'm sorry, but I'm just thinking of the right words to say. (I promise)
I know they don't sound the way I planned them to be. (I promise)
But if you'll wait around a while, I'll make you fall for me,
I promise, I promise you I will.
When your day is through,
and so is your temper,
You know what to do,
I'm gonna always be there.
Sometimes if I shout,
it's not what's intended.
These words just come out,
with no gripe to bear.
Movies:Twilight, lost boys, the covenant, any thing with a sexy lead role and vampires. ;)
TV:i dont watch T.V.
Books:stephanie meyer, anne rice.....that all
Likes:writing, hanging with my friends
Dislikes:preps, fakes, sell-outs, ect...
being a teenager sucks cuz no one takes me seriously.
Hobbies:skating, writing,
Vices:got lots
Virtues:sum...
Heroes:the bible says not to idolize any one other then jeasus and god himself.
Saturday, January 10, 2009, 05:59 AM GMT
[General]
I'm sorry, alright? I am sorry. I don't know how many times I'm going to have to say this but I'm going to get it all off my chest right now.
Braedon: I'm sorry for every time I hurt you, I'm sorry I never realized what a good thing I had until it was gone. I'm sorry I was so selfish and I'm sorry I lied to you. I'm sorry that every time that razor cut deep into my skin i was hurting you without even seeing it. I'm sorry I used you, I'm sorry I didn't realize he was abusing you. I'm sorry your no where to be found. I'm sorry I didn't go to your funeral.
Ibrahim: I'm sorry I asked you to come, I'm sorry I can't take it all back. And I'm sorry I didn't realize you were drunk. I'm sorry I begged you come and take me from this terrible place, I'm sorry you came, I'm sorry you drank, I'm sorry you drove, I'm sorry your dead.
Ashlynn: I'm sorry I can't be there when you need me most. I'm sorry I didn't visit you in the hospital. I'm sorry I only have a limited time with you, I'm sorry you have cancer. I'm sorry you are so amazing while I'm such a jerk. I'm sorry I don't deserve a friend like you, I'm sorry we got in that stupid fight. I'm sorry you have to put up with me for the rest of you life. I'm sorry but I'm not leaving you.
Amy: I'm sorry I got mad and told the whole world the truth. I'm sorry I didn't go to your trial. I'm sorry he got out so soon, I'm sorry I didn't believe you at first. I'm sorry for being so cruel when your mom walked out and you needed me most. I'm sorry I can't go back and change it all, I'm so terribly sorry I watched and did nothing as you were hurt over and over. I'm sorry I lied and said I wasn't the one who told. I'm sorry you have to watch him smile and laugh as if he did nothing wrong.
Greg: I'm sorry for nothing I did to you; for I know what you did was a million times worse.
I'm sorry to everyone I've hurt, lied to, disrespected, stabbed in the back, and betrayed. I wish I could take it all back. I wish I could take my life back from all this sorrow and regret. I'm sorry I was ever born and I'm sorry I did nothing to change this for so long.
I keep it real and thats a promise, I may be a bytch, but atleast I'm honest. Wahwn I walk by, you staop and stare, well keep on looking cuase I dont care. I have my own life and style, I'm not trying to please you or make you smile.
I'v made mistakes, actualy probaly more then my fair share. I've corrected the wrongs that can be corrected.
I wish I was the type of girl who always smiles, even when lifes just too hard, but who am I kidding? I breake down and cry, cut and do alot of irrational things when I'm upset.
One thing you need to know: You don't have to love me. You dont even have to like me. But you will respect me.
I am who I am and I say what I want, because those who mind don't matter those who matter don't mind.
Even though I know my love is never going to be enough for you and you want me to give it all up for you, I honestly do love you, but your not going to get what you want that easy.
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